The order of releases I had scheduled for 2019 have been altered, but I have such a serious reason why. I had released RED WATERS (the third novella in the Tainted Water series) and felt very emotional and lost since that book. I worried for my readers because it was such a tough read for them—Whitney went through unfathomable horrid times—but I ended up suffering also.
Due to another commitment in a series with other authors, I wrote Ivy’s Poison. This is another tragic and tough read that I struggled with, believing for the reason of it simply being a dark book.
When it was time to get back to back to finishing MIST to stay on schedule, my heart and mind kept getting dragged back to the next in the Tainted Waters series with Volatile Waters. This was supposed to be a standalone novella but has morphed into an epic-sized novel. And it has literally made me ill. I couldn’t understand why this book was so draining until talking with a friend, Michelle, in the book world. It finally dawned on me that one of the villains in this book was too close to home for me. It was hard to learn that I was abused by a certain type of sexual predator.
But I pushed on… continued fighting for my health and refused to let this book win.
Bound and determined, I wrote and wrote, until coming to a criminal scene Whitney experienced in Red Waters. Her POV didn’t give many details because she felt it was too gruesome to share. Yury felt it was important for readers to see how powerful Whitney really is. So, his POV takes us there and makes us live it.
That is when I knew why I felt I HAD to finish this book before I could move on with other releases or my own life. Two of my abusers have passed. They died before I had found my voice. Believe it or not, Yury, a human trafficker, gave me my chance to scream. Through Whitney, he listens to her say all she had to say, and in turn, he let me say all I needed to say.
Abusers have no right to do what they do. None.
It has been Yury’s determination to force me to see his story, as dark as it is. Now, I know he has been trying to help me all along. I will forever be grateful for his persistence and courage to grow.
Writing, I cried so hard as Whitney fought back, so tragically finally letting go of all she had powered through. As I wrote her words and actions, I realized it was me screaming and demanding justice for someone hurting me so deeply.
So, yes, I have a very serious reason why I am off my book release schedule, but for the sake of my sanity, it was a must because damaged souls are worth saving.